17 years old

This is an old song of the GazettE. It's very appealing and somewhat creepy on how Ruki managed to compose it, haha^^ He said he put his self into the shoe of a 17 year old pregnant girl left by her lover (very sad song isn't it?)

Juu Nana Sai (Seventeen Years Old)

The GazettE

I decided I had no regrets

A woman alone at Tokyo Station, I'm so tired...

And there's no reason to live

I thought the happy days would continue forever

There's this baby in my belly who looks just like you

I was so happy, so happy, but for some unknown reason, I couldn't stop crying

Does it make you unhappy?

Is it a burden for you?

Is that why you abandoned me and disappeared without a word?

The spring I was seventeen, I hated him and the wedding dress hanging on the wall

The last glimpse I had of you as you walked away is burnt into my retinas and won't leave me

"I'm tired of loving you," you said, and left without another word

Do you know...how I felt waiting for you all that time...?

The pain wells up again

Though I scream, nothing changes and I'm still dragging your shadow along

I don't want to make things hard for this baby who will eventually be born

I'm sorry. I can't even hold you tenderly as a mother should

The spring I was seventeen, I cried over my memories, though I know I can never return to those days again

Somewhere deep in my heart, I reach out my hand

Does it make you unhappy?

Is it a burden for you?

Is that why you abandoned me and disappeared without a word?

The wedding dress hanging on the wall...

"Where are you now?"

"Are you doing well?"

"Has your life been happy?"

"You're not how you used to be..."

With the wailing of this baby I haven't seen yet, I wait for spring...

haha^^ Good song. I'm 17!

Live☆Laugh☆Love

Shigeru

3rd Part

My high school classmates visited me. Yeah, haha^^ a part three of my birthday. Nothing much happened. There’s a small chat and they left to play at a computer shop with my brother. I slept on the other hand. I didn’t expect that they‘d return. My hair was a total messed when they came. That’s sort of uncool of me, haha^^

I don’t know why but I slept for 19 hours this day so approximately I was just awake for 5 hours. I think it’s because of the rain and the cool weather. I’ve missed this so much!

So at midnight, I ate my dinner then faced the pc again. I wish I had a reason to return to the uni. My favorite stores are near my uni but it’s just so freakin’ far! Transportation fee is so expensive just to shop so I wish I could ask my parents for it but that’s unreasonable without any good reasons (and I know that, haha). I want to buy my favorite band’s concert videos as soon as possible. (I hope I could find the one with subs)

Today I discovered this:

The GazettE will release their new song entitled “SHIVER” and it will be use as an op song for the season 2 of the anime Kuroshitsuji. I’m really excited with this anime since last year but now I discovered that the op is from my favorite band… It’s just so AWESOME! Plus, Alois Trancy (protagonist) will be dub by my favorite seiyuu and pop singer Mizuki Nana.

This birthday is too much. Tomorrow’s plan was cancelled but I’m looking forward of these first days of the month since it started with my awesome birthday :))

My GazettE ADDICTION is worsening but I don’t need a MEDICINE for it!
My GAZEROCK addiction is GOOD!

Live☆Laugh☆Love

Shigeru

Birthday

So yesterday (June 1, 2010) was my birthday, ah… yes it was. Haha^^ It was so amazingly FUN FUN FUN! Though I never expected it would be. Let’s start in the morning. I woke up with the prettiest smile in the world and greeted my mother a good morning. “What a lovely day,” that’s what I thought… “Let’s search for something to wear!” I found a cute jumper skirt I used to wear until I was 13 or 14 yrs old and it still fits perfectly. Ah, that was it, it matched the cute rose shirt that I received last last Christmas. So as you can see… I’m not really prepared, haha^^ I just received a phone call from my mother and said, “Let’s throw a party!” and the me who’s totally shocked and surprised replied, “Ah sure…” It was the day before my birthday. It’s hard inviting people to attend a birthday party tomorrow after. Haha^^ I’m going crazy, I thought no one could make it. It’s already 1 pm and no one still there. This sucks… My birthday party would end up like Tricia’s (PBB). Few hours later, my high school classmates arrived, and so my college friends. Ah, I’m so happy. I received a cute stuff dog (with some effects and abilities, haha^^) Looks like this :))

At my FB account, I received so many greetings even from the people I don’t know, haha^^. That’s nice. I’m thankful for those and I never really expected for gifts but I’m so glad to received things (who wouldn’t be?). The best thing that I received was a portable DVD player from my parents. I’ve been craving to have one. Now that I have it, I’m thinking how I should spend the money I’m saving for it, (haha). Maybe I’ll just buy an mp5; I broke my Ipod last month, which sucks.

And here’s a blouse… I’m into black so I love it!

Today, my best friend visited me. We really don’t do much, just hang together, eat, and go out. She bought me an ice cream as a present… so delicious! It’s my first time eating a Drumstick with Kit Kat. So sweet ♥ Unfortunately, I don’t have any pictures of me eating this...

Live☆Laugh☆Love

Shigeru

Enrollment

I’m crying of disappointment. This day is somewhat full of expectations and ended up into a mess. I wish I never wished for anything. Why it is so hard to have my wishes come true? I really hate myself. I wish I could be a little bit more mature, maybe this won’t hurt that much.

I hate boredom. Once I’m indulged into it, I can’t bring myself to cheer up again. I’ve been so grumpy today. I canceled my spree tomorrow for this day, for this very disappointing, boring, and waste of time day.

I woke up early in the morning to accompany my brother (with my mom) in his enrollment and to pay my tuition after it. I thought we’re going to have some time bonding or enjoy shopping together but there’s this, there’s that, seems their business won’t end. We went there at 7 am and leave at 4 pm. I totally missed the banking hours! There’s no way I could pay my tuition today! But since we’re on the mall already, I thought we still could enjoy doing something nice. We walked and began to window-shopping, my and my mom’s taste never agreed. We walked a little longer and my brother saw some shoes. We started to argue about his preference. The shoe looks so lame and so big for his tiny little foot. Then, we heard some music… “Ah! A band (a marching band), well whatever, I don’t care.” this is what I thought. In the other case, my mother was very very very much interested. She stares at it every time it passes by. This is a total piss off. I mean, do you know what it feels? It’s as if you’re just three people walking together but never had the same interest. I hope she’ll give some attention or care for whatever we are doing but all of those things were given to that stupid band. I’m not having fun at all. Fine, she could just stare to that stupid band forever; I’ll just stand here and sulk. I want to go home already, shopping like this is nuts.

In summary, I endured 9 hours of boredom just to eat at some fast food and watch a stupid band and idiotic fashion show. I’ll have to pay my tuition alone tomorrow since I told my classmate that my mom and I would handle it today.

Now, I’m listening to the GazettE songs. It amazingly cheers me up. I cried on the first song played. All of my disappointment are flowing with those tears.

Live☆Laugh☆Love

Shigeru